Album: Running With Scissors
Song: The Weird Al Show Theme

Oh, this is a story 'bout a guy named Al

And he lived in a sewer with his hamster pal

But the sanitation workers really didn't approve

So he packed up his accordion and had to move

To a city in Ohio where he lived in a tree

And he worked in a nasal decongestant factory

And he played on the company bowling team

And every single night he had a strange, recurring dream

Where he was wearing lederhosen in a vat of sour cream

But that's really not important to the story

Well, the very next year he met a dental hygenist

With a spatula tattoed on her arm (on her arm)

But he didn't keep in touch, then he lost her number

Then he got himself a job on a tater tot farm

And he spent his life savings on a split-level cave

20 miles below the surface of the Earth (of the Earth)

And he really makes a mighty fine jelly bean and pickle sandwich

For what it's worth

Then one day Al was in the forest, trying to get a tan

When he heard the tortured screaming of a funny little man

He was caught in a bear trap and Al set him free

And the guy that he rescued was grateful as can be

And it turns out he's a big-shot producer on TV

So he gave Al a contract and what do you know?

Now he's got his very own Weird Al Show!